The Best New Olympic Sport

   You know how in the Olympics there are sports that are rather unpopular and you think, why does this get to be an Olympic sport? Today I had an epiphany and realized there is a major sport, which an extremely large demographic practices and performs with great skill that is being totally excluded from professional sporting tournaments: Not washing the dishes!
   As a university student, I can vouch for the widespread participation in this event. For example, within my flat alone, there are about ten dishes that have been sitting out for at least a week! It takes a lot of skill in the area of negligence and disorganization to maintain that level of not washing the dishes. These aren't even just dishes, but pots, pans, mugs, cutlery and glassware as well. And from unsponsored athletes too! The form and stamina are quite remarkable.
   On a good day, my flatmates can be expected to produce about three dishes each, none of which show any promise of being washed for at least two days. Such a high functioning talent of not washing dishes, and they don't even break a sweat. Imagine what they could do after years of rigorous training and perhaps with a wider selection of foods and dishes at their disposal!
   I alone am not privy to this insane talent. Not washing the dishes is a skill mastered by a shocking percentage of the population primarily, but not limited to, post-secondary students. Like all talents, persistently not washing the dishes is developed through habit. However, at certain peak times, athletes who ordinarily do not excel at not washing the dishes can prove to be stiff competition for those who have done it all their lives. Rookies can really make a break through in the sport during exam time, the time immediately after a Thanksgiving meal, and during a break up.
   Not washing the dishes may well be the most untapped well of pre-existing talent on an international level. Bringing the sport to the Olympic stage would really showcase the raw talent that goes shamefully uncelebrated. The pool of veteran athletes is vast as well as the promise shown by those who dabble for months, and then slip off the not washing dishes radar.