- First we got a big ol' water bottle. It's blue and has a logo for a Montreal dentist's office that I've never been to. I stole the bottle from work because it'd been sitting in the photocopy room for over a year. Nobody's asked about it. Last night I think I probably drank a gallon total from it.
- An glass that is going on being empty for the past two days. I had a friend over who was thirsty, and I am a courteous hostess who obliges with water.
- My indestructible brick phone, because communication is key always.
- My journal, because I have a lot of feelings and trust no one.
- Alarm clock. Who needs a biological clock when you can have a high quality, battery-operated alarm clock that you got for Christmas over three years ago?
- A lighter. I don't smoke, but I have been lighting a candle a lot over this past weekend because my room smells like stale debauchery.
- An electric fan. I haven't actually used the fan since the summer, and ever day I have this moment where I think, "I should put that fan in my closet tomorrow". But tomorrow has never come yet, and now summer is close enough...
- Sweet-ass Ikea lamp that looks like the future. Special note: it doubles as a jewellery hanger right now. Got some necklaces hanging from it.
- Pencil sharpener.
- An eraser thats shaped like a pencil that I have gone to sharpen on more than one occasion.
- A sticky note with a list of literary contests, all of whose deadlines have passed.
- Post-it note pad with the top note that reads "zippers up the back". One of my three a.m half-asleep creative strokes of "genius".
- My meds without which I would turn into a three headed lizard at the stroke of midnight each night.
- A piece of toilet paper that I keep reusing as a Kleenex. My nose does this thing where it runs a tiny bit every now and then. It's like nose drool.
- A nickel. Probably change from the last time I payed someone for sex.
- Orange earplugs that I no longer use since they've fallen on the floor behind the table before- a place where no broom has yet ventured.
- A broken hair elastic.
- Dean of Students lip balm. They give out free lip balm at my workplace. I have so many. It's my strange addiction.
- Bobby pin. Pretty sure it's there because I've been napping a lot, and because my hair has been especially unwieldy this week.
- A blue dolphin charm from a friendship necklace, given to me at the beginning of the year.
- A tiny ball of blue sticky tack from before all my posters were framed.
- Just found another bobby pin under the fan.
So there you have it. That's my bedside table. The more I look over the list, the more I realize it's time to tidy my room.
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