When You Are Engulfed in a Fiery Tangle of Anger

   When you are engulfed in a fiery tangle of anger, what is there to do? If I lived alone I would blast scary music and dress like Taylor Momsen until I literally fell asleep. But in real life, when you're really fucking angry, does it ever help to be snappy with Starbucks baristas who seem not to understand the modern conventions of serving the public? You can be as passive aggressive as you like, but making their day worse rarely makes your day better.
   Even writing shit doesn't help because most of the time, if you're like me, you end up rambling without any clear purpose of what you're getting at. I wish I knew what I was talking about, I wish I could recommend some therapeutic behaviours. I often fantasize about going to the Dollar Store and buying hundreds of glass flowers, driving out to an empty parking lots and smashing them to as many smithereens as I can manage. However I often find my physical expressions of rage extremely underwhelming because while my will may be strong, my biceps are not.
   Sometimes Eminem helps. But then you remember thats he actually seems like a relatively nice guy, and his music seems less relatable as you rage around in a furious... fury. Actually though, I'm listening to Eminem right now, its helping me in a pretty solid way.
    Regardless of what you do when you're really outrageously mad, I think we can all agree that channeling your inner zen is a load of bs invented by Lululemon to sell unforgiving yoga pants. So when you're mad, go ahead and punch inanimate objects (providing they're shock-absorbent and you're willing to replace them), scream at yappy dogs and listen to Eminem (or if you're feeling real shitty, Odd Future).